Begin With The Independent End in Mind
Celebrating the ultimate objective of aging well
For the last several days I had been working on a post (that’s not this one), when it suddenly dawned on me that today is the Fourth of July. Childhood memories of my Army Colonel father’s oversized American flag hanging proudly on our front porch came flooding back. For heaven's sake, how did this not occur to me earlier?
I had an overwhelming feeling I would be remiss and irresponsible not to acknowledge the significance of Independence Day, the founding of the country that has blessed us all so much. Fortunately, it has great synergy with another topic I’ve been meaning to write about, so I decided to table my original article until next week.
While the Fourth of July technically commemorates the adoption of the Declaration of Independence on July 4, 1776, for me, it's a celebration of the indomitable American spirit—that seemingly impossible dream that has defined the United States since its founding. This unshakable spirit of independence runs deeper than mere self-reliance; it reflects a profound belief in freedom and a willingness to forge new paths, even against the odds.
Americans value individual rights and personal responsibility and have consistently demonstrated a fierce determination to chart their own destinies. This spirit is woven into the country’s culture; it’s in our DNA.
Looking at all the older people I’ve had in my life, the greatest distress, sadness, and consternation that I’ve seen in them as they age is the frustration of losing their precious independence, becoming unwilling bystanders in their own lives.
End goals
In my late thirties, as I faced the uphill battle of conceiving in my forties, aside from the ultimate objective of having a child, my end goal was to be a healthy mom who could run after a toddler and be in the game, not watch from the sidelines. That was the motivation for cleaning up my diet, starting an exercise program, recalibrating my hormones, and clearing my life of toxins.
Yes, the byproducts of this new lifestyle were gratifying and encouraging. I lost about 20 pounds, developed greatly toned arms and I could proudly wear tank tops again. My once painful and irregular cycles arrived like clockwork without the couple of weeks of migraines and downtime that I used to experience. Our home was as free from dangerous chemicals as I could humanly make it, cultivating a much healthier environment for my family and our future.
Starting with the end in mind propelled me to create a new lifestyle with cascading, long-term benefits, rather than quick fixes with short-term results.
Charting a course for independence
Our son just graduated from high school, and I’m proud to say over the course of his childhood, I was never relegated to the sidelines, a tall order considering he was a perpetual motion machine. As I consider the next chapter in my life, I have a different, but equally powerful overall objective.
I was listening to an author describe visiting a village in Sardinia where people lived well into their 90s and 100s, and he was marveling at the independence of the people he befriended. They worked in the gardens or fields, tended to their homes, socialized in the cafe, resided in generational homes…in essence, they lived until they died. My husband, Andrea, and I looked at each other and said in unison, “That’s how I want to go!”
My humble overarching intention is to live life fully as an active participant, not a spectator. I have a mile-long list of things that I’ve yet to accomplish, things I yearn to create, and places I’d love to see. Together with Andrea, we aspire to make a welcoming home for Alessio’s future family and be able to run after our grandchildren. I’d like to be self-reliant, free from pain and all prescriptions.
This means maintaining my health, strength, agility, and cognition…beginning with the end-goal of independence in mind.
Our innate American spirit
As Americans, we are innately independent. It is more than an attitude; it is our living tradition and the source of true joy and contentment. Our spirits soar when we are aspiring and achieving. We have the freedom and the ability to actively create and attain a future in which we can live well, age great.
Happy Independence Day!
The feature image is Andrea’s long-time trail-running buddy, Gary Hilliard, who passed away last April. He was 52 when the now-iconic image was taken during the grueling Badwater Ultramarathon, often referred to as “the world’s toughest footrace.” The 135-mile annual odyssey begins in Death Valley, California (below sea level), culminating at the Whitney Portal (8,360 feet) at the base of Mount Whitney, the tallest mountain in the contiguous United States. Andrea just so happened to be on the crew of another ultrarunner and witnessed firsthand Gary carrying the American flag—the symbol of determination, perseverance, and independence—all throughout the race to the very end.